I have been jobless for a week and a half. Oh, you didn’t think Mr. Mitchell would keep an assistant who has sex with her former boss on the office conference table did you? Let’s be realistic here, Mr. Mitchell in all his can’t-handle-women-with-long-hair-&-can’t-look-people-in-the-eye crazy thought I am the mess. Which, if I am going to be honest, I am a big sloppy mess. I don’t think hogs on a farm will come near me with my life being what it is. Oh, that and the fact I haven’t showered in five days and am subsisting on Slim Jims, oranges (got to have vitamin c – scurvy you know), and chocolate chips...cake is too expensive for a jobless woman.
Aria is holding her nose as she comes toward the couch or as I like to call it now my survival island. If there is a massive flood that overtakes Chicago and the water makes it up the three flights of stairs to our floor, I will have everything I need in life on this couch: my comforter, napkins, remote (hoping the television floats), assorted snacks (see above paragraph), large bottle of water and my red hoodie in case I get cold.
“Morgana I will pay you a million dollars if you leave that couch and take a shower, please!”
“You don’t have a million dollars Aria.” I tell her in between chews of jerky.
“Back when we were in college we went to parties in frat houses that smelled better than you. Besides we are going out tonight.”
I reluctantly set down the yellow and red wrapped meat like product and glare at her.
“I’m not going anywhere. I’m trying to catch up on Game of Thrones and The Walking Dead. I don’t have time to go out.”
She rolls her eyes and groans while taking a seat on the coach as far away from my odor zone as possible.
“I can’t believe it has come to this Morgana. But need I remind you it’s your birthday. Happy 30th dear.”
She starts to lean in for a hug but thinks the better of it and sits back. I reach for my cell phone on the coffee table and bring up the calendar. Oh god it’s March 3rd and I totally forgot.
“You’re right. How could I forget? I usually am reminding people weeks in advance.”
“I know. That’s why I think it’s imperative you come out with us tonight. You need to break out of this funk you are in, both psychologically and physically.”
Aria nods, “Yes, me and Evaleen. Oh and Tiffany is going to be there too. It’s Thursday SWIM meet but I thought we could also have your birthday celebration too.”
Tiffany? Since when is she friends with Tiffany?
“Wait...wait...wait. What?...um...what? Tiffany? What?”
Aria sighs again and turns a little to face me resting her head on her hand leaning back on the couch.
“Look, I ran into Tiffany while Evaleen and I had a SWIM meet a few weeks ago. She is actually kind of cool. She isn’t the terrible person you think she is Morgana. Tiffany has a twelve year old boy who is in the hospital. The SWIM meet is the only chance she has to get out and relax. She is a single mom, so it’s not like she has a ton of support.”
Now I feel terrible. All the names I called her. God I am going to hell. Oh let’s face it, I was going to hell long before I met Tiffany.
“Oh that’s terrible. Now I feel bad. I should at least buy her a drink...oh wait I have no money because I got fired AGAIN for the same thing in less than a month.”
“Look, I know it’s shitty. But just take a break tonight and tomorrow you can resume feeling sorry for yourself. Okay?”
“Fine!” I groan while removing the comforter and standing. My legs are wobbly as I have been on my ass most of the day.
“Oh dear god, that smell. It’s like a cat gave birth to a litter box. Go. Now. Before I get the vapors or whatever it is that people die of from toxic fumes.”
Aria is covering her face with her hand as her other hand waves me away.
I head off to my bathroom and take a much needed shower. Feeling refreshed after the time in the bathroom I put on a nice green dress and start to feel good about myself. I can do this. When I am back in the living room Aria, in a sleek pale blue blouse and dark skinny jeans, approves my outfit and we head out into the very brisk evening.
Once we enter the dark bar I see Evaleen and Tiffany already seated in a black padded booth chatting away. It’s evening so the place isn’t crowded yet. The bar, on the far side of the wall is a worn yet polished wood and the windows by the door are stained glass which was the style in the 1970’s when this place was built, but sadly just makes the establishment a bit depressing now. As we take our seats I give Evaleen a friendly smile.
“Hey Evaleen how are things at Mimir?”
She groans and starts to suck at her straw before lifting her head. Her blond hair up in a sophisticated French twist, small string of pearls around her neck and simple black sweater give her the appearance of a rich socialite instead of a bitter HR manager.
“Ugg, awful. I can’t tell you how much the Payne has been acting up. These past two weeks he’s been even more of a nightmare. We have gone through 12 assistants in the past 10 days.”
I nod and turn my attention to Tiffany as I REALLY don’t want to talk about Mr. Payne.
“Hello Tiffany, nice to see you again.”
She smiles sweetly and gathers her long brown hair to drape over one shoulder. Tiffany looks just as gorgeous as she did when I first met her, with her tan V-neck sweater accentuating her golden eyes and ample bosom.
“Great to see you again Morgana. I heard about the job problems, I can’t tell you how sorry I am.”
She gives a sympathetic grin.
“Yeah, well when you work for tweedle dumb and tweedle asshole maintaining a job gets hard.”
She snorts and covers her face in embarrassment, looking at Aria and Evaleen to make sure they didn’t notice, which they did.
“I think I can guess who tweedle asshole is?” Tiffany removes her hand and smirks while fiddling with her wine glass.
“Payne. Does any woman like him? I mean seriously that man needs to take a class on how to interact with people and not treat them like shit.” Evaleen adds to the conversation.
“Well, I feel bad for Tiffany. She’s his girlfriend.” I try to mutter the words as if I am just mentioning this fact in passing but the high pitched tone and supersonic speed that I utter them causes the entire table to stare at me.
“Oh he’s not my boyfriend. I mean, I did try once a long time ago. My husband had died in a car accident almost ten years ago and his parents and sister died in the same accident, so that’s how we met. We grew close as he would help me with my son. About a year after I made a move but he turned me down. We were still emotionally not ready to have a relationship, then over the years things changed. I see him more like a brother now than anything else.”
We are now staring at Tiffany with our mouths hanging open. She is nervously looking around at us expressing small giggles with snorts sprinkled in here and there.
“Oh, I would get why you think he’s my boyfriend, me telling you I am his girlfriend when we met. I thought I was helping him out, you know when you think a friend is being harassed by a guy, or in Henrik’s case a girl, so you tell them they have a boyfriend or girlfriend in his case. When Henrik would mention you Morgana I just got the impression that you were causing him trouble so I decided to play the girlfriend to get you to back away. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to cause problems.”
“Whiskey. The bottle and four shot glasses.” Aria holds up her hand for the waiter that is passing by.
“So, wait a minute. I...uh...you aren’t his girlfriend? Okay I can see that now. But the accident, my god, I had no idea.”
Tiffany’s eyes grow big and she glances around the table.
“I thought you knew. You know right Evaleen?” Tiffany’s eyes are pleading with Evaleen.
“No, I had no idea. No one in that office knows anything about Payne’s past, well, except the Mimir brothers.” Evaleen shakes her head and resumes sipping from her straw.
“Shit balls!” Tiffany exclaims.
Find out what happens next in THE Drunk Dial
Missed the previous post, then check out THE Meeting
This blog is 18+ years age appropriate only!
Payne Posts Menu
63. THE Insane
62. THE Bechmann
61. THE Morning After
60. THE Attack
59. THE Decision
58. THE Emergency
57. THE Welcome Home
56. THE First Day Back
55. THE Strange
54. THE Question
53. THE Crazy B
52. THE Teacher
51. THE Discussion
50. THE Mommy
49. THE Bar Fly
48. THE Watchful Eye
47. THE Big Guns
46. THE Never
45. THE Feast
44. THE Bathroom Threesome
43. THE Pee Pee
42. THE Fine
41. THE Shirt Attack
40. THE Police Song
39. THE Discovery
38. THE Pull
37. THE Aria Show
36. THE Switch Up
35. THE Delivery
34. THE Scheme
33. THE Drink
32. THE Uncomfortable Silence
31. THE Online Experience
30. THE Same Old Shi
29. THE Talk
28. THE Drunk Dial
27. THE Birthday
26. THE Meeting
25. THE New Job
24. THE Disagreement
23. THE Big Movie
22. THE Sleepover
21. THE Club
20. THE Leave
19. THE Beggar
18. THE Confrontation
17. THE Jackoff
16. THE Bathroom
15. THE Joint
14. THE Let Down
13. THE Truce
12. THE Phone Call
11. THE Assistant
10. THE New Year
9. THE Payneful Reminder
8. THE Holiday Party
7. THE Zipper Incident
6. THE Cake
5. THE Incident
4. THE Paperwork
3. THE Letter
2. THE After Effects
1. THE Interview